It’s the end of the single people study in Agra, India, and those of us who don’t live here are dying to go back home. India isn’t the easiest place to love. The people are mostly very welcoming, but disparity between the rich and poor is very hard on the heart.

It’s not that different from home, but we’re talking a population of almost a billion and a half. For every one person on the streets in Kenya, there are thirty of them here.

But there’s more than social strata to worry about. Penelope, the leader of the study on why some people prefer to remain single for life, is about to deliver her findings on the phenomenon.

“We’ve heard all sorts of reasoning on this subject,” she says, “from childhood trauma to dating mishaps, but I don’t think we’re any closer to cracking this nut. A good number of you cited personal space and freedom as the main reason for wanting to be alone. But this goes against all human social constructs. Man is a social animal.”

“To a point,” I raise my hand and say. “After all, too much of anything is poisonous.”

“Or maybe it’s just being selfish?”

“Since when is prioritising your own physical and mental well-being to avoid burnout a bad thing?” asks a participant.

“It’s not, but including others in your life shouldn’t necessary burn you out.”

“Someone said marriages are made in heaven,” another participant opines. “Then again, so are thunder, lightning, tornadoes, hail…”

“Of course, you have to take the good with the bad,” Penelope says. “You can’t buy a car and not expect to take it in for service every so often.”

“But with a car, I can trade it in any time,” I chip in, “and it won’t complain about not being loved.”

“And a car doesn’t get mad when I ride in another car,” shouts someone behind me.”

Someone adds, “And a car is not cranky.”

“Speak for yourself,” Penelope says with a smile. “There are days I have to coax my car into life.”

“Now you’re talking about my ex most days.”

Laughter all around.

“Seriously, guys, we’ve found no imposing reason why you can’t tolerate a mate. I think it all boils down to personal choice rather than anything natural or scientific. But given that the most important function of any species is self-propagation, how do you propose this would happen in a species that needs to take care of its young after birth?”

“All we need to do is come up with a better system than the prevailing one,” I say.

Penelope nods. “I’ve heard that before, Tom. You believe children should be raised in a commune, but how healthy is that?”

“We’ll never know until we try. Some people said humans will never fly. Look at us now.”

Like most existential questions, it’s a futile conversation that continues without any solution in sight. Eventually, one thing is clear: Even people who want to remain single most probably don’t know why they do. Just like the way people say what their favourite colour is.

Maybe the answer is simpler than any of us wants to admit: The heart wants what it wants.