GAKUYA: Going on 50? You’ll be invisible to the world but there’s an upside

I am 50 and I am invisible.

This is not the opening line to a movie or a novel (at least not one I’m aware of), but rather the feeling that in a society such as ours, chock-full of young people, being middle-aged makes one invisible. I don’t mean that literally, like in The Invisible Man (the movies and the H G Wells novel). I’m saying written off, edged out, ignored, ostracised and dismissed as an active participant in society. This is what happens when you get to age 50.

It doesn’t happen all at once. It is a gradual, involuntary process, and it starts right about the time you hit age 45, and by your 50s, you are vanished/banished.

In the sense that, across most spheres of life (and in media), you will hear a great deal said about Gen Z. You will have heard quite a bit about Millennials and, most recently, Generation Alpha is making its way into the spotlight. Boomers, too, show up from time to time.

But my generation, Generation X, children of the 1970s, 80s and very early 90s, middle-aged people today, we’re never mentioned. And if we do come to mind, we are almost always mistaken for Boomers. Society, it seems, has pushed 50-year-olds off to the sidelines of social consciousness. 

For example, advertising proper never talks to middle-aged people. We get health check-up ads, retirement plan ads and early bird funeral package deal offers. You will be hard-pressed to find cars, clothes, cosmetics, a fizzy energy drink (low on sugar, of course), targeted at mid-lifers. Ever seen an attractive middle-aged person in an ad sipping on a cool, new flavour drink while standing next to a new model car?

And then we have business achievement awards, and 40 people who have accomplished noteworthy feats in business under the age of 40 is as high (age-wise) as this awarding goes. People over 50 get Lifetime Achievement awards. Which, while I am sure it is an honour to receive, has a rather disconcerting ‘the bell tolls’ ring to it.

It feels like a summation, the final act, as though past the age of 50, one cannot go on to achieve even greater feats than the ones already achieved. Just saying, it would be nice to see trophies handed out for 50 under 50, 60 under 60… maybe even 70 under 70.

This edged out, written off story continues, this time when it comes to new hires, entry-level positions. Most times, jobs have, as a requirement, that the applicant not be over the age of 50. It is implied, explicitly.

Now this may come as a surprise to most of you, that many middle-aged people (deep thinkers, introspective types) come to a point after a 30-year career that they decide to do something new, from scratch. Only they do not qualify as entry-level new hires because age 50 is not considered new, and exit, not entry, is the word HR has in mind for people my age.

Pop culture, too, tends to gloss over middle-agedness. Take movies, many muscle-bound, action hero superstars, drooled over worldwide, are actually middle-aged; often airbrushed to look younger on-screen. Idris Elba, Jason Statham, Vin Diesel, Dwayne ‘The Rock’ Johnson, they are all in their 50s. And in the real world, over 50s don’t jump out of moving, crashing trucks that are on fire – not that anyone does, at any age… my point is, at 50, it’s perilous enough action balancing on a chair to change a light bulb. 

It is said that ageism is one of the last socially acceptable prejudices. I agree. When it comes to older people, it is discrimination based on the stereotype that older means cognitive decline. It’s one thing to have senior moments, it is ludicrously another to suppose that what this means is you get less smart and you know fewer things the older you get.

It’s not great to be ignored because you are older, but midlife invisibility is not bad either. You are free from societal expectations and judgement, when no one is paying any attention to what your age-group is up to. And as a nonentity age bracket as far as marketing strategies are concerned, you are invisible to targeted self-esteem eroding unrealistic portrayals and comparisons in media.

This, my fellow 50-year-old brothers and sisters, is a free pass to live your life largely free from conformity, because nobody cares about you, in the good way.