“That might take up to a year,” Inspector Tembo, my boss and Sophia’s father, tells me. “That is, if we’re lucky.”

“What do you mean if we’re lucky?” I ask.

“I hate to poop where I sleep, but all cops are not the same. Besides, the only reason she’s where she is in the first place is bad cops who want her out of the force. What if we get one of those cops to investigate the case?”

Inspector Tembo is getting old and going senile early. On more than one occasion, I’ve had to turn him around and back into his house after heading to work wearing only his boxers. But sometimes his noggin works properly, and he makes loads of sense.

“So,” I say, “what do we do now? We can’t just sit and wait.”

“No, we can’t.” And with that, he stares at the wall.

“Uhm… sir? I’m afraid that’s not a solution.

“Of course, it’s not,” he erupts at me. “We’d have to mix two substances to get a solution, wouldn’t we?”

And just like that, I’ve lost him. I know he has contacts in high places, but it’s like everyone has forgotten he’s supposed to retire and Tembo doesn’t want to remind them. So now it looks like it’s up to me to work out how to get Sophia out of prison.

Then I remember something. A while back, a DCI guy had come to Jiji Ndogo on a case. I didn’t like the guy because he was too handsome; he had designs on Sophia and she didn’t seem to put up a lot of resistance. But desperate times call for desperate measures. Even if those measures mean getting help from a fisi.

I swallow my pride and call Detective Gundua.

“Makini?” he says. “I don’t think I know any Sgt Makini.”

“You were here at Jiji Ndogo on a case, remember?” I persist. “Sgt Sophia and I—”

“Aah, Sgt Sophia. Why didn’t you start with that. How’s the most beautiful woman on the force?”

I bite my lip and say, “She’s still my wife.”

“She is? Wonders never cease. What can I do for her — I mean for you, Sergeant?”

Although it feels like a terrible idea, I explain my problem to him.

“Did you just say that some bad cops have Sophia wrongly imprisoned in Shimo La Tewa?” he barks, freshly interested. “And you never thought to call me as soon as you learned this?”

“I’ve been pursuing other channels and—”

“How long has she been there?”

I feel like a child at the headmaster’s office. “Two months.”

“Two months! Dear Lord! What does she still see in someone as incompetent as you? Christ! Some people sure don’t deserve the good things in life.”

I want to be angry, but I can’t afford to be. “So, will you help me?”

“No, Sgt Makini, I see no cause to help you.”

“But you just asked why I didn’t call you before.”

“Right. But it’s not about you, is it?”

“And Sophia?”

“Of course, I’ll help Sophia. She’ll be out by tomorrow.”

“Thanks!”

“But don’t expect her back for a week.”