As the world marks World Suicide Prevention Day on September 10, psychologists are calling for greater awareness of the signs of distress and more open conversations about suicide.
The call comes as suicide cases continue to raise concern, with the death of 32-year-old Mercy Wachinga Maina among cases that have brought the issue into focus.
Mercy was found dead in her Lavington apartment in Nairobi about a month after her death, according to reports.
Police are treating the death as a suspected suicide, with investigations ongoing.
But while individual cases may differ, psychologists say suicide is rarely the result of one event or one problem.
It can emerge from a complicated interaction of psychological, social, economic and environmental pressures.
They say recognising signs of distress, offering support and encouraging people to seek professional help can play an important role in prevention.
There may never be a simple answer.
Suicide, psychologists say, is rarely the result of one event or one problem. It can emerge from a complicated interaction of psychological, social, economic and environmental pressures.
Sometimes, warning signs may be visible, but those around a struggling person may not recognise them.
‘I am tired’
For psychologist Leah Wanjiru, one of the biggest obstacles to suicide prevention is the silence surrounding the subject.
“For the longest time in our society, conversation around suicide has been treated with silence, fear and stigma,” she says.
Someone may say: I am tired. I don't see a reason to live.
Or they may tell a friend or relative that they feel unable to continue with life.
The instinctive response, Wanjiru says, is often to shut down the conversation.
“We tend to tell them, ‘Stop such thoughts.’”
But what if the person is not looking for a lecture?
What if, at that moment, they simply need someone willing to sit beside them in the darkness?
“They are looking for someone who can sit with them in the difficult moment and remind them that you cannot carry this alone,” Wanjiru says.
It is a simple intervention: stay, listen and take the person seriously.
For Wanjiru, this also means changing how society talks about people who die by suicide.
A person should not be reduced to the manner of their death, she says.
Suicide is not simply a matter of being weak, selfish or attention-seeking. It is a complex public-health issue.
And importantly, suicide is preventable.
The signs we overlook
Psychologist Julia Waithera says modern life has brought enormous pressures, from finances to family responsibilities.
Often, people communicate that they are struggling before a crisis becomes acute.
“They talk about how they feel hopeless; they have burden; how they are sad,” she says.
Others may withdraw.
“When someone starts withdrawing from you, just know that something is cooking within them,” Waithera says.
Withdrawal by itself does not mean that someone is suicidal. People withdraw for many reasons. But a sudden or significant change in behaviour can be a reason to check in.
That check-in does not need to be complicated.
How are you doing?
You have been quiet lately. Is everything okay?
I am here if you want to talk.
For Waithera, the most important thing is what happens after asking the question.
“We need to be present in their lives, listen without judging them,” she says.
The problem, she adds, is that people are often quick to judge and slow to listen.
“Just be there and listen to them. Give them a shoulder to lean on.”
A global public-health concern
The numbers show why the conversation cannot be confined to individual families.
The World Health Organization estimates that more than 720,000 people die by suicide every year.
Suicide is also a major cause of death among young people, ranking as the third leading cause of death among 15–29-year-olds globally, according to WHO.
The burden is particularly significant in low- and middle-income countries, which account for 73 per cent of global suicides.
But the figures only tell part of the story.
For every suicide, many more people attempt suicide. WHO identifies a previous suicide attempt as an important risk factor for suicide.
WHO says suicidal behaviour is influenced by a range of social, cultural, biological, psychological and environmental factors across a person's life course.
That complexity matters because it challenges the idea that suicide can be explained by a single cause.
It also means prevention requires more than telling people to “be strong”.
Prevention starts before crisis
WHO's suicide-prevention framework recommends several evidence-based interventions, including limiting access to means of suicide, responsible reporting by the media, building socio-emotional skills among adolescents, and ensuring people affected by suicidal behaviour are identified, assessed, supported and followed up.
Prevention also requires collaboration beyond the health sector. Schools, workplaces, families, communities, the media, government agencies and other institutions all have a role to play.
But another layer of prevention happens in ordinary homes and friendships.
It is the person who notices that a friend has stopped answering messages.
The colleague who sees someone who was once outgoing becoming increasingly withdrawn.
The sibling who realises that “I am fine” no longer sounds convincing.
The parent who decides to ask again.
None of these actions guarantees that a suicide will be prevented. But they can help break isolation and create a pathway to professional support.
‘You are not a burden’
Wanjiru's message extends beyond those trying to help.
It is also directed at people struggling themselves.
“You are not a burden,” she says.
“You don't have to figure out everything today.”
There is no requirement, she says, to carry unbearable pain alone.
A person experiencing suicidal thoughts can reach out to someone they trust — a friend, relative, psychologist or other mental-health professional. If there is immediate danger, emergency help should be sought.
For those around them, the task is not to have all the answers.
It is to listen.
To remain present.
To take expressions of hopelessness seriously.
And, when necessary, to help connect the person with professional care.
There is no single face of a person who is struggling.
There is no single reason why someone may reach a suicidal crisis.
And there is no single person responsible for prevention.
But there is something almost everyone can do.
Check on the person who has gone quiet.
Ask the difficult question.
Listen without judgement.
And when someone tells you they are not okay, resist the urge to dismiss their pain.
Sometimes, prevention begins before anyone says the word suicide.
Sometimes, it begins with simply saying: “I am here. Talk to me.”
