Singer and worshipper Rozinah Mwakideu has opened up about the emotional turmoil she faced following the collapse of her marriage. Speaking on the debut episode of her podcast, Crowned by Rozinah Mwakideu, she shared the deep resentment she felt during that period.
The Kenyan gospel artist, known for her powerful vocals and faith-based music, revealed that her exit from the marriage sparked a crisis of faith. While she was expected to remain firm in her spiritual journey, the reality of her pain led her in a different direction.
A Crisis of Faith and Anger
Rozinah admitted that she struggled with intense emotions after walking out. At the time, she felt she should have been more spiritually stable.
"When I walked out of my marriage, I was already supposed to be very grounded in Christ and to know what I'm doing, what is right and what is wrong," she explained.
"For me, I was angry with God. I was angry with life. I was angry at the way things turned out," she said.
The Night of Rebellion
The singer recalled a specific day after her departure when she decided to act out against her usual character. She went out and purchased clothes she would not normally wear. This included a top she described as "sexy," paired with tights and heels.
She remembered the specific internal dialogue she had before heading out that evening. "And God, don't ask me questions tomorrow. Because I'm going to be bad," she recalled telling herself.
That night, Rozinah chose to consume alcohol. Although she describes herself as a light drinker, she had several glasses of wine. She expressed that this was a deliberate act of defiance born out of her anger.
"I said to myself that as I am here today... I am so angry and I'm going to drink," she added.
Finding Preservation
Reflecting on those moments, Rozinah noted how easy it is to spiral when in pain. In a social media post accompanying the podcast release, she highlighted the risks of such emotional states.
"When we are hurting and angry, we can become self-destructive," she captioned that snippet from her podcast.
"I thank God for hiding and preserving me in that period of my life," she stated.
